LOL – Only read this if you know me really well…otherwise you might be needlessly annoyed

A couple of weeks ago my soul sister and I had just finished a beautiful hike in the mountains.  We decided to go back to her house a grab a HOT cup of tea.

As we sipped from our mugs my friend was enthusiastically showing me the new “super sonic” bird feeder her children had given her for Christmas.  She explained with much excitement how this glass and steel contraption was so much better for the birds in terms of keeping them safe from other animals that might like to access the feeder (like bears).  Did I mention she backs on to a greenbelt?

Having two cats myself, and knowing that my friend has a couple of rent-a-cats that come by often for meals and love I asked:  “What do the cats  think of the bird feeder?”

“Oh, we haven’t seen much of them lately – so I don’t know.”  A few minutes later there was a neighborhood cat, named Java, at the glass balcony door eyeing up the bird feeder.

My friend first spoke eloquently about how beautiful Java was (he is a gorgeous and big cat) and then opened the door and tried to “shoo” Java away.  Have you ever tried to “shoo” a cat?  It doesn’t work…especially when there is bird feeder and LOTS of little birds flying above its head.  But after several scoldings Java seemed to disappear.

With the birds now safe we sat back down on the couch and resumed our conversation.  My friend remarked on how great it was to have this bird feeder as there now were all these new birds she’d “never seen before” coming by.  In the exact moment those words left her mouth, one of these unusual birds swooped through the sky towards the feeder and WHAMO Java pounced out of nowhere and caught the bird mid-air in his jaws and they both disappeared.

“Well,” I said. “I guess that’s one bird we’ve never seen before and one we’ll never see again.”

Warning: Only read this if you know me really well…or you might be needlessly annoyed

My son Adam is very musical and was recently invited to participate in his elementary school choir.  

When driving him to his first session he remarked: “Mom, you know the problem with choir is they let anyone in. Some people aren’t all that good and that’s a problem because we’d be much better if only the best could join.”

LOL: Warning: Only read this if you know me really well…or you might be needlessly annoyed

Last week my son Adam and I went to a Vancouver Symphony performance.  We arrived in good time and got seated.

 A couple rows in front of us sat a gentlemen wearing a rather tall hat with a small brim.  It was similar in style to those hats that were all the rage for men in the early sixties (think Mad Men’s Don Draper), only higher like a top hat. 



Seeing this as a “teachable moment” I pointed out to my 11 year-old child that it was not polite to wear hats indoors, particularly at concert performances as they obstructed the views of the persons sitting behind them.



He acknowledged that this was indeed rude and that he would refrain from hat-wearing under similar circumstances.

When the symphony began Adam pointed out to me that the offender had removed his hat. 

Unfortunately, he happened to have the tallest, pointiest bald head (remember the SNL coneheads?) I’d ever seen…and our view was no better. 

LOL
Warning: Only read this if you know me really well…or you might be needlessly annoyed

‘Tis the season for family stories.  

 When my father was early in his career as an educator he taught at a minimum security prison for some time.  He was extremely enthusiastic and excited about his role spending extra hours tutoring the inmates and passionately responding to their queries. 



He was quite proud of the relationship he had established with one student who had a particular interest in geography.  My father, ever so keen to serve, found himself doing extra research and bringing in map books and geography texts for his star student to review.



After a few months of my father’s excellent tutelage, the inmate disappeared.  He was eventually found miles from the prison and in his possession was a neatly folded textbook page – highlighted and marked with notes.  It was one of the maps my father had eagerly shared.

LOL Warning: Only read this if you know me really well…or you might be needlessly annoyed

I was having dinner with a friend the other night and somehow we got onto the topic of employee engagement surveys.

My friend plays a senior management role in a real estate development/management company. She told me that when their most recent engagement data became available she and the office leader sat down together to see “how they were doing.”

In one particular area they had a rating of 62%. The office leader said: “Well, the industry average is 59% so we really aren’t doing too badly and won’t need to improve in that area.”

She told me: “There’s nothing like working with a company that is aiming for mediocre.”

Warning: Only read this if you know me really well…or you might be needlessly annoyed

I was conducting a career advancement workshop for a group of high potential talent recently and we were discussing the concept of “not being a secret and showcasing your leadership” when one of the participants piped up:  “Well, if my boss can’t see how great I am, then that’s his problem.”

Warning: Only read this if you know me really well…or you might be needlessly annoyed

A few years ago when my son Adam and I were driving to the grocery store, he proclaimed proudly from his car seat:  “Mom, I’m four-and-a-half years old and I know almost everything.”

Smiling to myself I responded that I thought that was terrific.  He then added:  “But when I’m five I’ll know everything.”

He’s now eleven – can you feel my pain?

LOL Warning: Only read this if you know me really well…or you might be needlessly annoyed

I travel frequently to consult with and deliver programs to my clients.  At the beginning of the year you may recollect that the security at airports was significantly beefed up.  So much so that one could not take any carry-on baggage larger than a briefcase (which had to be basically empty) on the plane.

As I absolutely detest waiting for baggage to eventually roll down a conveyor belt, I always pack all that I need into one carry-on suitcase.  Well, this “no large carry-on” edict was a real pain for me.  It meant I had to change my packing system, show up much earlier at the airport and basically lose a lot of time to re-configuring my travel system.

Nevertheless, on this particular day, I dragged my suitcase down to the car, threw in my computer bag and purse and off I went…grumbling away to myself about these inconveniences.  I arrived at the airport grabbed my purse and computer bag, then instantly felt pure dread.

I realized I’d left my suitcase in my driveway.  In my hasty departure from home, I’d throw two pieces into the car (as I always did) and completely forgot my suitcase.   This is not a good thing when the suit you are going to wear to your presentation to one hundred executives the next morning is 100 minutes by car away (to my home and back to the airport), and your flight leaves in less than two hours.

My first reaction – call a friend.  It’s amazing how creative my friends can be when I’m under pressure. She came up with a great idea. She went to my driveway, called a cab and had them deliver my luggage to me at the airport.

You can imagine my relief upon receiving my bag from the cab driver.  As I examined it to ensure it was mine, I noticed it was looking battered and a little tattered.  Obviously, unbeknownst to me, I must have hit it with the car when leaving my driveway.

LOL – Warning: Only read this if you know me really well…or you might be needlessly annoyed

I was on my way out to the airport the other day and found myself stuck behind a big polluter. This large white truck was spewing out toxic black fumes. It was so awful that I closed all my windows and vents…and I could still not escape the nauseating odor.

Unfortunately, I was boxed in by cars on either side and had to remain behind the vehicle for a few miles. Eventually, we started to climb a small hill and I took this as my opportunity to pass the offender.

As I pulled up alongside, I happened to notice branded boldly on its side the name of an organic vegetable delivery service. That gave me a whole new perspective on global warming.